Robz, The Oxford Urban Artz Joke

I'm sorry to say that yesterday we gave up our time and our talent only to be mucked around by some disorganised idiot, we actually did what any self-respecting artist would do and we just left. After getting up really early to be there on time, after all we had been told that we were opening the show, we drove 83 miles to arrive at the venue. Warning bells should have gone off then, Robz the Urban Artz Idiot was meant to come and meet us at the gate in "one minute". Fifteen minutes later we were still waiting on the road like melons, so we showed ourselves in, only to find that the stage wasn't even ready, they were still in the process of painting and construction. It soon became clear that Robz hadn't prepared the event very well, everyone was complaining, it was an utter shambles. The show was meant to start at 12.30, no chance, by 2.00pm, the stage was still not finished and not even one person had turned up to watch. Dear Robz had invited a cameraman from a tv station who also had the misfortune to show up and not even be able to film anything. Whenever we tried to ask Robz what was going on, he managed to evade us and run off somewhere else, he seemed more interested in organising children's activities. Never fear, he told us we could set up on the stage soon , the sound check was all to be done with our set cos we were going to be first on, whenever we tried to pin him down to a time however , he just pretended to be busy and ran off somewhere else. We went for a walk and when we came back, we noticed that all the other artists were doing their sound checks, mind you they were only singing along to backing tracks like karaoke, anyway we found Robz again, what had happened to our sound check? He asked me if I wanted to get up on stage and give it a go- no you imbecile we are a proper band and our equipment needs to be set up like we've been telling you in our correspondence for the last four months. By this time I really wanted to walk, it was nearly 3pm and he hadn't even had the courtesy to tell us what was going on or even offer us a glass of water, we had been there since 10.30! Anyway, we eventually set up our stuff, only to find out that the sound man didn't have a clue, as helpful as he was. I am used to singing with a wireless set up, but we were unable to use it in the end, I thought fine, just do it the old fashioned way, but even then we were getting a tremendous amount of feedback and I couldn't hear what I was doing over the monitors. Everyone was doing their best to sort it out, then Robz came over and had the cheek to say that things were taking a bit too long and we better get a move on. Dear Robz, did it ever occur to him that things were taking a long time because he had had us sitting around for four hours in the chaos that he had created, we asked for a plug board and it had taken him 45 minutes for him to get us one etc, etc. Then Gerald told him it was unlikely we could play unless they sorted out the sound and he just said "OK we'll go with that then." I just saw red, I thought you little bastard, making us wait all this time without so much as an apology and I just laid into him and gave him a piece of my mind, if he thought we were going to go quietly, he hadn't counted on me, I told him exactly what I though of him and his crappy show. As were packing up our stuff, I saw all 20 people in the audience coming in, Robz didn't even have anywhere for them to sit, they had to get their own chairs, shame. As we were leaving , the sound man came up to me and said he was sorry as he was really looking forward to hearing us, well I hope he liked rap music cos that's what all the other artists were doing, it's not as if we fitted in with anyone else anyway! I was glad that we left, sorry that we didn't play, but why should we be treated like that by a little w*****. Just put it down to a bad experience! Beware all bands of a person called Robz from Barton in Oxford.